Dr. Lerner why did you put together this website on the bris ceremony?
As a practicing obstetrician and a committed Jew, I felt that there was a need for a down-to-earth, medically-accurate, yet lay-oriented source of information for people interested in having a bris for their newborn son. The other current sites on the web about the bris ceremony are either very superficial or oriented towards the most traditional Jews. My site is aimed at modern Jewish couples who practice various levels of ritual observance.
Tell us something about your personal and educational background?
As mentioned in the About Section of this website, I graduated from Princeton University and Harvard Medical School and then did my obstetrics and gynecology residency at the University of California, San Francisco. Following that I returned to the Boston area to set up practice. After a few years working with another group, I went into practice on my own (Newton-Wellesley Obstetrics & Gynocology, P.C.) and over the years have been fortunate to see that practice grow to our current nine physicians. I am grateful for the opportunity I have had during those years to participate with women and their families in delivering over 10,000 babies.
During my career I have also become interested in various subjects relating to obstetrics and gynecology including (1) shoulder dystocia—a complication where, after delivery of the baby’s head, his or her shoulder gets stuck on the mother’s pubic bone, sometimes leading to permanent damage of the nerves leading to the arm and (2) the current flawed system for adjudicating medical liability U.S.
I am married to a wonderful woman who is also a gynecologist and together we have three young adult children who are very busy beginning their careers. My avocations are language study, playing ice hockey, and reading history.
You yourself are a mohel. Do you like performing brises?
Very much so. The circumcision part of the ceremony is really only a minimal aspect of it. What brings me great pleasure is to see the joy shared by a family welcoming the arrival of their new baby into their family and community. Brises vary tremendously; I do brises where the only people present are myself, the couple and the baby as well as brises where a hall is hired and there are hundreds of people present. All of these ceremonies are moving, vital events in the life of the families involved.
But perhaps my favorite brises are those I do for immigrant families, mainly Russian and Israeli. To see how these young couples are struggling to make their way in the world—especially those from Russia—and who now have a child of their own who is an American citizen is tremendously heartwarming for me. It always reminds me of what it must have been like for my great-grandparents who came over from Europe at the start of the 20th century. They, too, had to make their lives and build their families in a new and—to them—strange and sometimes hostile environment.
What are the questions you are most frequently asked by couples contemplating having a bris for their newborn son?
There are several, along with the answers I generally give:
- Shouldn’t I have my baby circumcised in the hospital? Isn’t it cleaner, more sterile, and safer?
Where you have the circumcision performed makes no difference to the health or safety of the baby. The circumcision rooms in hospitals are usually no more sterile or cleaner than any room in your own home. Moreover, as multiple babies come through hospital circumcision rooms, there might be even more chance of exposure to bacteria or viruses. We know from centuries of experience that it is extremely safe to have a bris at home.
- I’m Jewish but my husband/wife is not. Does that make a difference?
Those strictly adhering to Jewish law would say that if the mother of a baby is not Jewish then the baby is not Jewish until it undergoes a conversion ceremony. However the Reform Movement—and a large percentage of all Jews in the United States—consider any baby born to a couple where even one parent is Jewish to be Jewish if the intent is to raise that child as a Jew. Thus it is perfectly fine to perform a bris on a baby, one of whose parents is not Jewish.
I personally look upon such situations from two additional vantage points:
- Performing a bris for the child where one parent is not Jewish makes things easier for the child if later on in life he decides to “become more Jewish”. He will already have had a “kosher” bris, something he will not have to repeat later on. And why not have a bris? Since most boys in the United States are circumcised, the boy is almost certainly going to be circumcised anyway.
- For a “mixed” couple to have their newborn son circumcised results in that couple getting more deeply involved in Jewish life and ritual. It enables them, if they so wish, to deepen their involvement in their Jewish roots and in their local Jewish community.
- We are not very religious. Can we still have a “kosher” bris?
Yes. For Jews, circumcising their newborn son, observing the Sabbath, and studying the Torah/Bible are the highest priority mitzvahs (commandments) stipulated in Jewish law. The requirement of performing ritual circumcision on the eighth day is so sacred that it is done even on Shabbat and major Jewish holidays such as Yom Kippur.
For a bris to be “kosher” the correct ceremony has to be followed (in any language; it does not have to be Hebrew), the circumcision performed in the ritually-specified way, and the proper blessings said. That is all that is necessary. A minyan—10 Jews over age 13—is not necessary.
- I know we are supposed to have the bris on the eighth day after the baby’s birth but could we move it to a more convenient date so that my relatives and friends can more easily attend?
This is a tricky one. Jewish law specifically and repeatedly states that, as commanded by God in Genesis, a bris should be performed on the eighth day following the birth of a male baby. While as a “reform” mohel I sometimes bend the rules when it seems reasonable and appropriate to do so, I try very much to stick with the eighth day commandment.
There can, however, be extenuating circumstances. As detailed in the website (Timing of the bris), certain conditions supersede the requirement for an eighth day circumcision: delivery via cesarean section if the eighth day would be on Shabbat or Jewish holiday, the baby being ill, and several other conditions. I would also consider moving a bris from the eighth day in a situation where there was a sudden death in the family, where people traveling to the bris were held up en route by weather, strikes, etc., or if for whatever reason it was absolutely impossible for a close relative to come to the bris on the eighth day.
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